Biggest Risk Taken and…

Published on by Yinglan

Daily writing prompt
What’s the biggest risk you’d like to take — but haven’t been able to?
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The biggest risk I would like to take might be to refuse to pay my aunt back my current house debt and move out of my current house into a place where I can live by myself and take charge of my life and be this grown-up that’s not under anyone’s control.

I actually attempted this TWICE before – once in 2016 and another in 2018 – and failed at both attempts miserably as I ended up submitted to my mom’s will with my tail between my legs. I feel like I should not had done this, I should’ve persevered and stuck to my plan.

I tried to run away in 2019 after my mom ruined the family Christmas dinner by telling her siblings terrible things about me like I wasn’t sitting right there. For some reason, that time, I wasn’t planning to start a life on my own. I feel like part of it was driven by emotions and part of it was driven by the fact that I had been on an intermittent fasting regimen and was constantly swinging between manic and depression.

Now that I think about, I feel like I could’ve succeeded all those times if I just refused to give in. It was so simple yet it felt like the hardest thing to do at the time. I think it was the way my mom spoke of the future that somehow made me imagine of a brighter future if I stayed.

Darn her for feeding me optimism!

If I have to take this risk now, I don’t know if I can do it. Even though I am making more money now, my cash flow is somehow much more restricted now than 5 years ago. I don’t know why, perhaps it’s the bills. Even if I were to go out to rent an apartment, I don’t know how I would make rent each month with rent more than the amount I’m paying now each month.

I suppose this will just have to be fantasy for now while I stay in this controlling regime of my mom.

27 thoughts on “Biggest Risk Taken and…”

      1. You could do it but you have to do it through legal channels, whether it’s your house or not, especially if your mom has lived there for a while. You can’t just throw people out, not these days.

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  3. Why are you running away or leaving? Wait until your mom goes somewhere and your aunt goes someplace else, Throw their stuff in the street, change all the locks and close the curtains…

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    1. How does one do that? They would have to gone at least a month to achieve something like this. Let’s just say over 70% of the stuff in the house is theirs. I can probably fit my things in a Uhaul and toss out the rest.

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      1. Not true on both counts. With squatters it’s a matter of timing. As I understand it, Yinglang owns her house. She can pretty much do what she wants to two people who don’t pay rent because they have no legal status. Try very hard not to be scared to defend your rights.

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  7. It would be a good idea to have an “emergency fund” equal to about six months’ expenses. That way, you wouldn’t need to borrow money from your mom to get the car fixed or some other unforeseen thing. Good luck!

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