A month ago, while waiting at the airport for the flight to return home from Japan, mom called her sister in China and learned her 80-some-year-old dad was comatose in the ICU. He had slipped and fallen in the middle of the night on his way to the bathroom, frightened by a mouse, at least that was what he told my aunt before entering a coma.

It all happened about a week earlier, shortly after we had begun our trip to Japan. We weren’t notified because no one wanted to stress us out during our trip but believe it or not, we were already stressed, at least I was.

In a twist of fate, he woke up two days later. It seemed to had surprised mom. Had she thought this was the end? Had she wanted this to be end?

Until this week, he has been unable to walk and unwilling to try any sort of rehabilitation. Mom kept wondering if he was faking it. One thing he could do, though, was eat. According to my aunt, he ate like each meal was his last. He demanded my aunt bring him the most expensive fishes and meats. I wonder if he’s having an end of life crisis because obviously, he doesn’t want to die, who does?

A few days ago, mom showed me a video of her dad finishing a bucket of rice. Holy moly, how can someone eat so much despite sitting on a bed all day watching TV and shouting at the nurses?

Ever since learning he can walk again, mom has been pushing the family to support her suggestion of sending my grandfather to a senior home but no one has been bold enough to tell it to my grandfather’s face. You see, as much as anyone hates to admit it, my mom is the female version of her dad – both stubborn, mean, and over-reactive like a bomb will go off at any moment.

What my grandfather want seems to be a live-in caretaker but my aunt isn’t sure of leaving one person to handle her dad.

“If you want your dad to enter senior housing, why don’t you tell him yourself?” I suggested a few nights ago when she came into my room and interrupted my thoughts like always.

“Ha, so now, you all are trying to make me the bad guy.”

I sighed, “No one is trying to make anyone a bad guy. I’m just saying…” Before I could finish, as always, she left my room without shutting the door.

It’s all one frustrating affair as mom doesn’t want to talk to her dad and wants her sister to the middle person but her sister is afraid of her dad, the same way mom’s other siblings come to me with their problems. Meanwhile, as always, my thoughts don’t matter. It’s all about what mom wants.