Wow! Are we really at the end of the year already?

In the last week, I got the Christmas lights strung up in my front windows and the railing by my front door, and got the old wreath hung up on the front door, all to try to get myself to feel a little bit of the Christmas spirit. I even watched a couple of Christmas movies on Netflix. Nothing, I couldn’t feel a single spark of holiday spirit this year.

To be honest, though, it’s been getting harder and harder in the last few years. I feel like an obstacle is knowing I’m heading into the shortest days of the year – December 15-25 – which is 9 hours and 13 minutes.

As I write this post, I am trying to recall what happened in November.

I remember feeling down and sad at the start of November because of things at home. Deep down, I understand that things will probably never get better but sometimes, it’s best to let out the frustration than to bottle it up. I suppose it might be a reason I lost my holiday spirit.

I spent the last week doing long walks in the park, trying to elevate my mood and get my energy back. I haven’t felt energized in almost a year, thanks to my messed-up thyroid. My smartwatch has been keeping track of my energy level and it keeps putting me at middle to upper 70% for energy. My mood has been slightly elevated but I’m still not feeling the spirits of the holidays.

December will be a short month in terms of work. There will only be 3 weeks of actual work in December with the company shutting down for Christmas and the New Year. There are also 2 parties at work, which I look forward to every year. It just about the only fun thing in December.

I will also be completing my CPR training to complete my certification as an EMD dispatcher. I don’t think it will bring me anything other than a sense of pride and that I will know what to do in an emergency. I don’t suppose anyone from my real life will give me any praise for such accomplishment.

Unlike last December, I am staying home for Christmas this year. As much as I would love to do a road trip like last year, I think I will opt for rest this year.