As a kid, do you ever have store where you go in and feel like you want to buy everything? For me, that store was either Circuit City or Best Buy or Fry’s Electronics when I was living in California.

I just loved going into those store to look at computers and all the new electronic gadgets that was new for that year like a CPU with a CD-ROM that can read and write CDs or a webcam. Everything looked so cool and futuristic and I wanted it. But then again, I was a kid and without a cent for allowance, I couldn’t afford any of that stuff and with parents like mine, there was no way they would buy me that stuff.

As I grew older, that favorite store changed. As much as two years ago, before the pandemic, my favorite store was a high-end grocery store that’s located about 15-minutes away. It was like walking into a candy store but with cheeses. It’s got all sorts of artisanal cheeses from across Europe to the small farms across the U.S. It had those cheeses that you thought it was myth before seeing it before your very eyes.

Yesterday, I went to Home Depot with the goal to get some more parts for the drip irrigation I’m setting up in my garden beds. When I went in, for some odd reason, I headed into the garden section instead of the plumbing section of the store. I don’t know what attracted me there but something clearly did and before I knew, there were items in my shopping cart I never thought I’d buy like rooting powder for plants, vitamin tablets for seedlings, and packets of seeds for veggies and flowers. I wanted to get one packet of all the seeds from that shelf. I knew I can afford them now that I have a steady stream of income but reluctantly, I put all the seed packets back.

“You don’t need them,” I chided at myself. “You have plenty of seeds in the freezer. Besides, you know how mom will react when she sees the packets of seeds.”

Almost against my own will, I turned away from the garden section and headed toward the other end of the store where the irrigation parts were located. I ended up getting more than I needed – adjustable drippers, manifolds, tubing – but I figured I might need it if I’m to redo my entire irrigation in order to conserve water during this drought.

This morning, I woke up. There was a notification on my phone telling me I have credit card bill due tomorrow, amount: $900. After doing some mental math, adding up the remaining bills for this June, I’m going to end up with about $100 left in my bank account at month’s end.

My mind kinda went a little wild because before yesterday, with my recent raise at work, I felt like a rich kid but now, I feel like I’m back to square one, back to my old pauper self. “No more shopping spree for you!”

Bonkers!