Good morning! Come on in! It’s a good day to have some hot drinks and relax.
I’m bidding goodbye to my garden this week as we are expecting our first frost to roll in early Monday morning, by which time most of the plants in the garden will die of severe hypothermia. Unfortunately, there’s not much I can do except let it run its course. I spent the last few days picking viable unripe tomatoes and ripening them in a paper bag. I won’t be working in my garden this weekend as rain and snow is expected.
I think I’ve reached a low point this week. I became so tired of mom always belittling me – thinking of me as someone stupid – and kept mentioning the accident. I mean, what’s passed is in the past. Stop talking about it.
We were both supposed to go into office Thursday. To be honest, as much as I like to be in the office, I was dreading that day because mom was driving and we can’t go in separate car as she does not have a parking pass. Only I do and she doesn’t want to fork over $12 per paycheck to get her own.
I don’t like to ride in the car with her as she has a tendency to complain from the moment we get in the car until the moment we reached our destination. One thing after another. It made me want to bang my head against the wall.
After listening to her whine and complain for the duration of the drive, I dropped my stuff off at my cubicle and immediately went to reward myself with Starbucks – the best part of that day. It was my therapist’s idea – to do something I can control when I feel like everything is out of my control. Starbucks, I can control. I tried the pumpkin spice again, this time without the whipped cream and it was much better. The whipped cream was too greasy for my liking.
Fast forward to 1:30 PM, mom waltzed into my cubicle wanting to go home. I was deep in my work and she completely broke my concentration. I didn’t want to go home, not yet. I wanted to use the quiet time to do more work. Reluctantly, I told her to text me when she’s ready. I hate it when I have to work around her schedule. Why can’t she work around mine? It’s not fault she dislikes everybody on her floor.
Turned out, mom wanted out early so she could get me to proofread her translation assignment. It was terrible, I tell ya. The grammar was horrible. It made less sense than the version Google translate gave me. I ended up spending almost 3 hours deciphering the 7-page Chinese article and fixing the grammar on the English translation. Why not make me the company’s Chinese translator as well?
If we were having coffee, I would tell you the best part of the week had been Friday. Mom got off work early and exhausted herself with cleaning up the yard at her other house (the one she refuses to live in) and went to bed at 5:30 PM. It was such a rare treat when I get to enjoy a quiet night by myself.
I did a little garden cleanup – refilled my compost bins, gave a little water to my poor wilting veggies, and brought in my pepper plants for the night – all the while waiting for UPS to deliver a brand new raised bed I bought a few days ago. I can’t wait to assemble it next week and move my blueberry bushes and my strawberry plants into this bed. If there’s room, I hope to add some blackberry canes in there next year. Then I’ll have myself a little berry patch. How about that? I can soon gorge on berries during the summer. 😄😄😄
Another great thing that happened this week: I saw some spectacular autumn colors last Sunday when mom planned a trip to Provo Canyon. I knew it wouldn’t disappoint (the scenery, not mom). I did, however, wish mom would’ve stopped complaining. Her brother-in-law (BIL) was driving and during the almost 2 hours drive, she complained about one thing after another. I don’t understand why she’s complaining so much when she hates when someone else complains.
I was glad I brought my earbuds along and filled my ears with music. Here are a few of my favorite shots from that day.
#weekendcoffeeshare is hosted by Natalie of Natalie the Explorer. I appreciate you stopping by and hope to chat again same time next week.
This is Another Story 
wow! These are great pictures with autumn colours. You’ve captured those very well. I am so sorry to hear about your experiences and hard times. Hope everything will be better.
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Thank you.
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Why is your mother not in therapy? I had a mad mother. I also endured abuse, but different. I think nationalities have a single personality so in that sense the personality of Chinese is different to the Morocco personality. And if the nationality personality is disturbed by hormones and other chemical imbalances the effect is different.
My mother got Alzheimers. That was another thing together.
Can you not separate physically? Live in another abode, work in another building? Anyway, ignore if not useful. Your heart is in your pictures and they are all lovely.
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She doesn’t believe in therapy or anything to do with mental health. She think those suffering from mental health problems are psychologically weak. She said she’d died a thousand deaths if she was as weak-minded as those people. I personally don’t believe people suffer from mental health is weak, I think they’re the ones who are strong and they’re stronger for admitting it and seekinh help.
I don’t think it’s a nationality thing. Perhaps she is affected by hormones, who knows?
I wish to be separated physically and often try especially at work because it seems unprofessional. We work for the same company, unfortunately. I couldn’t find a job when I needed one and this was all there was but now, years into my job, I like it. I think she’s unsatisfied though so if anyone should switch jobs, it should be her.
She has her own house, just refused to live in it and wants to sell it next year. *Sigh
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I understand. I do. Don’t lose your lovely self though. ❤️
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Beautiful photos! Much more impressive than around here (too many evergreens).
Yep about the garden. The storm is just now pouring over the Sierras. Still warm, but dark and very windy enogh that we had a potential power-outage warning this morning. I’m heading out to clear what’s left of the garden… quite a few peppers. Too bad the Bells won’t have time to ripen, and a lot of green tomatoes.
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It’s dark and windy here though not enough to cause power outage. I had to make sure I locked all the garden towers so they don’t go rolling on their own.
Are your peppers in the ground? If they’re in containers, you can bring them in to overwinter. I think they just need a minimum temperature of 50 to sleep for the winter without killing them.
The green tomatoes can be a great compost source. That’s what I’m planning on doing with them anyway.
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Lovely photos Yinglan. I’m sorry that your mom pushes your buttons and irritates you. Try to ignore her.
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Thank you.
Sometimes, these things are easier said than done. *Sigh
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I know. 💖
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Fantastic autumn photos!!
Always sad to read about your problems with your mother. But how exciting with the new raised garden bed. I have an unhappy blueberry bush, probably got too little water this year because it’s been so awkward to water the plants in that area. But for the next year we’ll have a better plan for that.
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Thank you.
I’m sorry to hear about your unhappy blueberry bushes. It might not be water, though, have you tested your soil to make sure it’s acidic enough? Blueberry bushes love super acidic soil. I’ve been having to add soil acidifier twice a year just to make sure my blueberry bushes are happy. I learned most plants likes less water than more. Good luck with your blueberry bushes next year.
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Hi YingLan,
Sorry to hear that your mom continues to make life miserable.
I wonder what would happen if you moved into her home for sleeping. You’re driving again. Maybe there’s some peace and quiet there.
As always, your photos are wonderful and make me want to be there.
Stay sane.
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Hi Gary, I haven’t driven since the 12th. I was hoping to get to drive to office this week but it appears she’s changing her mind at the last minute again. I tried to convince her but she’s not really budging, saying we should carpool to save on gas. Honestly, I think she just want control and I can’t work according to her schedule. It’s just so frustrating.
She keeps wanting me to housesit while she heads out and if I want to go out, it must be with her. I’m finding myself starting to losing interest to do anything again. I don’t know whether it’s winter blues coming or something.
Seeing those autumn colors was probably my happiest in a while. It truly was beautiful. 🙂
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Beautiful fall colors!
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Thank you.
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You really hit Provo Canyon at its fall peak. Your pictures are gorgeous.
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I think I caught it in time. 🙂 Thank you.
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Such spectacular photos!! I hope that at least brought you some joy.
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Thank you. Yes, the photos brought me a little bit of joy. I can look at those colors all day. 🙂
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