Happy Saturday!

If you read the title, you been warned…

I have been feeling frustrated and angry lately. I don’t know at who exactly. At myself? At the world? Or perhaps because I’ve been so focused on the garden that I have once again neglected my emotions.

Speaking of the garden, I have been automating things, starting with watering. For the last few months, I’ve been researching on drip irrigation systems that don’t required the faucet. After spending days and weeks doing deep dives on Amazon, reading various reviews on these faucet-less drip irrigation kits, I finally decided to go for it. I bought 2 kits at first – one for each tree – but now, it’s expanded to 4 kits, which will cover all the raised beds growing edibles.

As you can tell from the photo, the water source is that large tote of water. Currently, that water lasts around 3 days but then again, I’ve set the system to water every 12 hours at 20 minutes, which is set to distribute 16 liters of waters among the drip stakes. I’m still using ollas to keep the soil wet but with the drip, the water in the ollas last longer.

No one was impressed by what I did. My mom didn’t understand what it was, so she reacted by giving me another lecture on spending money on the garden. She seems to think supermarket fruits and vegetables are more superior than homegrown and keeps urging me not to grow anymore things.

“We’re a month and a half away from going to China!” She said the other night. Great, she’s been counting the days.

I have been trying not to think about the trip. The trip, to me, feels like a deadline – the day when I must get my fall and winter garden in order. Watering must be set up, vegetables must be planted, garden must be cleaned up before I leave because I can’t count on anybody to help me maintain the garden when my mom drags me half-way across the globe for 3 weeks.

Not once did she asked how I felt about the trip. In fact, she practically forced the trip on me after I repeatedly told her no. “I’m paying for everything,” she said, as if that makes a difference. I’m having to have to train my co-workers to do my tasks and I’m spending my evenings making sure the garden is running smooth. Meanwhile, all she does is complain about work and lie on the couch until bedtime.

I find myself feeling quite lonely these days. I find I can’t talk to anybody about anything. Most times, when I tried to talk to my mom about something, I will either get a “shut up” or an “I don’t care.” The only thing she will talk to me about is either about the upcoming trip or about the stock market. Did I tell you I think she chased away another friend? My neighbor hasn’t talked to me in weeks, maybe months, because the last time she came around, my mom practically shooed her away?

Yes, another friend gone.

These days, I will either be in the garden or with my headphones over my ears watching YouTube or Netflix. If she doesn’t want to talk about something I want to talk about, why should we talk at all?

Anyway, thanks to Natalie for hosting WeekendCoffeeShare and I hope you have a wonderful week ahead.