I cannot be in more agreement with this quote.

In our universe a star explodes and dies every single second and there’s you, worrying about work tomorrow.

— Blu Mar Ten (@BluMarTen) May 31, 2015

Why are some people so fixed to work anyway? Why can’t we just slow down and enjoy life for once? Take a day off and instead of focusing on chores and worrying about the next day, we just kick back and chill?

What’s up with earning money anyway? It’s a bunch of paper and sure, it can get us so many things but it can never bring us happiness. That’s what I don’t understand. Some work their whole life, unhappily. Never slow down, always the same routine, running from one job to another and for what? Honestly, it just feels like they are chasing a bunch of paper.

How about this? Why do some people feel the need to control every aspect of not only their life but someone else’s life as well? Why can’t they just let that person make their own decisions?

My mom is one of those people. Money, work, and control freak, all-in-one.

It’s been over a month since she became unemployed and to tell you the truth, she’s even more stressed than when she had a job. And here I thought she was bad when she was working.

This is the third time, as far as I know, that she became unemployed. The first was in California, the second time was in Salt Lake City, and now, the third.

November so far has been hell for me, much much more hellish than October. At least, for October, I got to go on a trip far far away. This month, all I have to look forward to is Thanksgiving and even then, I will be working through it. Homework, translation job, you know.

November began with our tenants, delaying their payment of rent day-by-day. As each day went by, my mom grew anxious and took all her anxiety, frustration, and stress on me. Meanwhile, I have my own stress to deal with.

My grades are sinking and if I don’t really pick up my effort and do well in the remaining three weeks, I might end up failing my courses.

Of course, that was my goal from the beginning. I mean, who doesn’t want to do well in school? But chaos upon chaos fell down, hitting me like an asteroid. First, it was my mom’s other property. After the tenant moved out mid-September, it’s been struggling to rent out. She stuck the “For Rent” sign in front of the house and my phone’s been ringing off the hook but for some reason, it just couldn’t be rented out.

Then, it’s the other property. On the first of the month, my mom was anticipating the rent. She kept asking. “Do you think they will pay the rent on time this month?”

“I don’t know,” I answered. Honestly, I doubt it. I swear, she sucks at reading people. She sees the bad in good people and the good in bad people. I guess that’s a good thing in some situation but in this situation, it’s a horrible thing.

Anyway, 10 days later, still no rent and that’s when she realized, “They are using my niceness.” I wanted to clap and say, yay, you finally get it! She should’ve seen it from the first month.

Anyway, so much chaos and all I wish to do is to worry about everything another day and just rest for a day. You cannot believe how I wish time is frozen right now.

Thank you for listen,

Sincerely,

Yinglan