I have never watched a video of myself. Often times, I’m behind the camera, not in front of it. When I visited China more than a decade ago, I didn’t have a camera. All I had was a camcorder with a 3.2 Megapixels camera and during that trip, I took about 4 tapes worth of footage. I don’t know where they are now, somewhere in the basement perhaps. Anyway, not once did I let anyone film instead of me. It was my show and I was the director. So that was 360 minutes of mom, step-dad, step-grandma, and other relatives and I wasn’t in any of them.
Meanwhile, I have heard a recording of my voice and let me tell you, I DID NOT like it. My voice sounds super babyish and whiny and don’t get me started on singing. I thought I have a good voice. That’s why I enjoy singing, right? So one time, I decided to record myself singing and when I played it back, it was terrible! I sounded off-key and that’s just plain wrong. I deleted that recording three seconds in and since then I have never wanted to hear my voice ever again.
As some of you know, I used to be a Toastmaster and for a time, I was my club’s VP Membership and VP Public Relations. We were a small club and constantly trying to get people to join and as an idea to promote the club, I had asked if it was okay if I brought a camera and recorded everyone’s speeches. Everyone in the club turned down the idea, something about being too public. I was disappointed at first but later, I was somewhat glad because I don’t think I ever want to appear in front of a camera.
Therefore, to answer today’s prompt, let’s just say I find both of those things equally unbearable. Although, unbearable might not be the right word. When I listen to my voice, I can’t help giggling, laughing while my face turns cherry tomato red . That sounds more like embarrassed than unbearable and if I do that just by listening to my own voice, I’m not sure what I’ll do when I see myself on TV or something.
As a closing, here is a comic strip I created today and this is as close of a replica of my room as I can make it.