#WeekendCoffeeShare: General Update on Life, Work, and Mounting Anxiety


Hello, come on in from the cold. Please sit and join me for a virtual coffee.

I hope you enjoy this view because this was the view from my window yesterday as I worked. It was raining Wednesday night before the rain transformed into snow early Thursday morning, and well, it just kept snowing until Friday mid-morning. How’s that for the first snow storm of the season?

If we were having coffee, I would tell you I received a surprise on Thursday when I was awarded Employee of the Quarter for the 4th quarter of 2021. It was my second time getting this award. My first time was the 1st quarter of 2020. It was a huge honor, at least in my opinion, because (if you read my posts) I am often criticized within the family by my mom and her family. So getting recognized at work is a big deal.

I felt like I was someone getting their 15 minutes of fame as many co-workers (even those who don’t know me) sent me congratulatory remarks. I could feel my cheeks glow redder than Rudolph’s nose each time I see a remark pop up in my inbox. Can you tell I am awkward when it comes to being praised?

If we were having coffee, I would tell you I feel like a deadline is coming even though it’s nothing but the usual. Then why do I feel my anxiety mounting? Perhaps it’s because of my big operation, which it’s 3 days away (on Tuesday). I hate my brain for imagining all kinds of worst-case scenarios while my optimistic gut keeps telling me it’s going to be okay. It’s like being pull in two different directions.

It’s the reason why I had to put my blog on the back-burner for the last few days. The pressure and anxiety made it near impossible to concentrate on anything other than work, which is the only thing constant at the moment, so it seems. I really hope next week will be better.

If we were having coffee, I would show you my plants.

Unfortunately, the roses are finished. For some reason, even those that grew roots rotted, either because of the humidity or overwatering. Turned out mom didn’t want the roses, she said almost 2 months later.

Anyway, I’m growing herbs now – basil, thyme, lemon balm, and rosemary. The rosemary and basil were seeded on the last day of October. I had to re-seed the lemon balm and thyme mid-November because the thyme wasn’t doing well and the lemon balm couldn’t germinate.

According to the internet, these herbs thrive on neglect and so far, it’s doing well. I accidentally over-cared the basil and the leaves turned yellow, so neglect it is – water once a week, don’t feed it, just forget about them.

Thank you for joining me for this weekend’s #weekendcoffeeshare. I hope we’ll both return next week.

20 thoughts on “#WeekendCoffeeShare: General Update on Life, Work, and Mounting Anxiety

      1. Thank you! I’ve given up on having basil in the winter because there’s too little daylight here during the winter months. But I usually succeed with buying a plant and replant it in a pot with decent compost, and put it in the kitchen window in the spring. Every time I’ve tried to have it outside, even in the greenhouse, it’s died or at least been very unhappy. Our house is too small to have grow lights and other accessories but I’ve been thinking of buying it to have more success with my seedlings.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Most herbs don’t like the cold. I don’t use compost for my herbs since most herbs don’t like rich soil. I use a soil-less potting mix consist of coconut coir, that way, I won’t have any unexpected bugs on the house. For grow light, you can get a simple clamp light with a grow light bulb. It doesn’t take a lot of space, just a corner, at least for me, it is. I wish you the best of luck in your planting endeavor. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Nice plants. We have a couple of smalltrees that we just planted, that we’re questioning how well they are going to survive. I feel your pain regarding recognitions and all that. I actually had a small statement all typed up to add to this comment in an earlier attempt but unfortunately I accidentally exited out of the page and lost what I had typed. Basically had to do with the fact that I don’t do well accepting praise or recognition myself…certainly not in person – I tend to get all flustered and nervous, and don’t know how to respond.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. I hope your trees survive the winter.
      I am the same way when it comes to recognition. I’m glad I haven’t had to make a speech yet but when others send me congratulatory remarks, what more can I say than “thank you”?

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi Yinglan,
    Sorry it’s been so long since I’ve visited your blog. I have been ather focused on my research/writing projects on WWI and a side research project on Australian author: “Ethel Turner” who wrote “Seven Little Australians”. I hope you’re surgery goes well and I fully understand those competing inner voices. I think it’s actually helpful in a strange way because it’s your strong self guiding and encouraging your anxious self, and it means you can help yourself get through this as well as being supported by your loved ones. I personally see this as a good way to be, even if you do wrestle with yourself a lot.
    Please keep me posted on how you’re going!
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Rowena, how fascinating it is to get to research historical events. I often listen to history podcasts at work and discovered I’m fascinated in the events of the early 20th Century, specifically between 1920-1930. This time period is so under-emphasized as it is between the 2 great wars.
      My surgery is in a few hours as I’m writing this comment and I am already looking forward to be over. I hope to provide another update this weekend. Thank you for dropping and have a great week. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I hope your surgery went well. I’ll check out your post shortly.
        I haven’t looked into the interwar period much. However, I can imagine how going through the horrors of WWI would lead to the desire to radically change the world and utopian thinking.
        Best wishes,
        Rowena

        Liked by 1 person

  3. As I write this, your surgery should be done. I hope it went well. Be kind and gentle to yourself in your recovery. Don’t let your mom force you into doing anything you shouldn’t do before it’s time. Congratulations on your award.🎉👏 I can tell it was well deserved. Clearly people at work do appreciate your going the extra mile, which you do all the time!

    Liked by 1 person

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