#WeekendCoffeeShare: Nagging Thoughts

Okay, I’m going to make this quick. It might be the caffeine talking because I’ve been feeling jittery, like I’m walking on a wire. Maybe I’ve been having too much coffee lately, trying to stave off the tiredness. So excuse me if I start talking in bullet points.

I haven’t been sleeping well this week, probably have something to do with the weather. We are in the middle of a drought. The sky wants to rain, I can tell, with the humidity ramping up and the stickiness I feel after a shower. It did rain, fortunately, and though it was for only 20 minutes, it was still something. Something tells me nature will find a way to correct itself.

I went to the orthodontist this week to get an evaluation for my teeth. For the past few years, my upper gums have been getting on and off inflammation because when my previous orthodontist removed my braces, he failed to mention he left two chains inside my gums.

I’m getting an evaluation from an oral surgeon this upcoming week. It looks like a major surgery is in my future – the extraction of the 12 teeth that are stuck in my gums. Who knows how much that’ll cost.

On the same day, the orthodontist provided me an estimate for braces. Looks like I’m going to have to have braces again.

Braces sucks, did I mention that?

This time, I’ll have to pay all of it out of pocket. The number wasn’t what I thought though, it was actually lower but then that’s only for braces, what about the surgery and the stuff I have to do after braces? I’ve been pondering on whether to do it. If I don’t, I’ll have infected gum for the rest of my life, if I do, who knows what it will cost me?

I recently did another DNA test, hoping to get a different result for my genetic makeup. There was a sale for the 23andMe DNA + Health kit on Amazon prime day. The results looks a lot more detailed and different than the one I did with Ancestry. Ancestry said I’m 100% Chinese while 23andMe said I’m

  • 49% Chinese
  • 38% Southeast Asian
  • 10% Chinese Dai
  • 3% Vietnamese

How different is that?!

On my blog, I often mention I’m never lonely when I’m alone but this week, I’ve been feeling lonelier than ever. It’s not the “having no one to talk to” part that’s making me lonely, it’s the “it’s like living alone without the freedom of living alone”, if you get what I mean.

Mom doesn’t talk to me anymore.

She has sunk deeper and deeper into the YouTube universe. There’s not a moment of the day when she’s not watching something on YouTube. YouTube is playing 24/7 and before you ask, yes, she even takes it into the bathroom for shower. The only times YouTube isn’t playing are when she’s driving and out and about.

I told her friend about this who visited two weeks before and her friend was shocked and felt a little sorry I had to tolerate that.

Sleeping next to her one night in our cabin in West Yellowstone, she freaked out because the room’s wi-fi was lagging, causing the video to stop. It was the middle of the night and took me a long time to fall asleep after that.

It seems now, all I’m allowed to say is “what are we having for dinner?” All the other times when I’m trying to start a conversation, she’d say, “Don’t talk to me,” or “shut up.” It looks like as always, the only person I can count on is myself.

If we were having coffee, I would thank you for joining me in this edition of #weekendcoffeeshare and hope we’ll both return next week.

17 thoughts on “#WeekendCoffeeShare: Nagging Thoughts

  1. Tonight, chapli kebab will serve in dinner at my home. Boiled rice has also being prepared, so looking for a nice Saturday dinner.
    I hope your dental treatment goes well.
    YouTube really sucks the viewer in. Many times, I just move to the next video after finishing a one.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. As my mother got older, she spent most of her time re-watching favorite movies and TV shows on her VCR. They lived in Dad’s home town, where he had a broad network of friends, so he handled any depression or loneliness by walking downtown and having coffee with folks. I think it gets harder for some people to deal, and we/they grab onto something to keep filling up the emptiness.

    Sorry to hear about the dental catastrophe. That’s scary! Hope things work out well at the end of the procedures.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sometimes, I can cope with loneliness okay especially when I have things to do. Right now, I’m just waiting for the weather to cool before I can do some landscaping without the fear of getting sunburned.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I did my DNA test at 23 and me as well. I am 90% Swedish and 10% Finnish. I had no idea about the Finnish ancestors. They even pinpoint the time when some of my ancestors lived in Finland to 1850-1940.

    I am sorry you are struggling with your mom.

    Is there any chance you can get a good deal with a dental insurance? I had a dental insurance when I lived in the US, it cost me about $30/month and I did not have to have an initial checkup before getting the insurance. It included two free checkups/cleanings every year, and other procedures you paid some out of pocket, but the majority was paid for by the insurance. The percentage part the insurance paid when I needed something done became higher every year. Maybe worth looking into different alternatives?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 23andMe is very specific in the aspect that it can pinpoint when each ancestry showed up in a specific region. I like that a lot.
      I have dental insurance from work and it covers two cleaning and some procedure. Unfortunately, it doesn’t cover this type of procedure.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. It is hard to know what to say. I hope you could get insurance to help. As to your mom, hardest of all. My one thought is can you talk with her physician? It is hard to live with someone who treats you as if you aren’t there, or someone who is there, only not really. Glad you are able to blog and connect with people here. Best and blessings, Michele

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have dental insurance but I doubt it will cover it. I’d be grateful if it covers 20%. It doesn’t really matter how great the dental insurance is, dental insurance is still not as good as medical insurance.
      I don’t think she has a physician. She not the kind of person who sees a doctor of any kind. She once told me her dad treated her in a similar way, maybe she’s just mimicking him??? I agree, it is very frustrating.

      Liked by 1 person

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