Sunday Poser #127 – Rules of Life

What is one rule you’ll never break?

I have 3 simple rules in life:

  1. Never take shortcut in life
  2. Never borrow money from mom or a relative
  3. Never ask for help from mom or a relative

Obviously, I’ve already broken 2 out of the 3 rules. Mom can be very persuasive when it comes to lending me money despite my constantly telling her no. I feel like she wants me to borrow her money so she has something to dangle in front of me. That way, whenever she throws a temper tantrum, she can tell me how much money I owe her.

There’s a reason I don’t like to ask for help, particularly from mom and my relatives. No one ever does what I want. Their effort is often either half-assed or they take over and the result is not what I wanted. With Mom, there’s also a possibility that she might throw a temper tantrum until I let her take over and allow her to do it the way she wants.

An excellent example is my lawn. I wanted a rock garden, not a yard completely filled with rocks and zero grass. The landscape design is totally tasteless and not what I wanted but when I tried to object, she threw a temper tantrum because I wasn’t doing what she’d wanted. It isn’t that I am not appreciative of their help, it’s just if I’m asking for help, the result should be on my terms, not yours.

So do you see why I’m reluctant to ask for help? Nothing comes out what I want when another hand is involved. So why don’t I just do everything myself?

My final rule didn’t exist until 5 years ago when I had quit my previous job due to miserable working conditions. I was having trouble finding another job was there wasn’t as many “Now hiring” signs back then. I was unemployed for four months and during those months, I was depressed, manic, and miserable.

On the one hand, I was draining my savings at an alarming rate as I was paying for my house mortgage, bills, and even my own groceries. I never asked mom to help out financially during those four months despite she was the only one working and each night, she would come home and take all her frustration out on me. “How many jobs did you apply today? Why are you not getting any interviews? Stop pursuing your worthless passions!”

As there weren’t many accounting jobs available at the time, I was running this blog while pursuing my passion of becoming a writer on the side as well as learning to set up my own virtual business. With me constantly needed to visit the doctors at the time due to my health, I thought it’d be a great idea to work from home.

As a temporary solution, I even signed up for freelance gigs. One day, I landed on a gig – data entry – which turned out to a fraud. I was the fool who deposited a bad check with my phone and got charged by the bank for depositing a bad check when I had zero income.

After getting scammed, I made a rule for myself – never take shortcuts in life. It’s not worth it. The only way to pay bills is to find a stable job and work my tail off to bring home the bacon.


13 thoughts on “Sunday Poser #127 – Rules of Life

    1. In my next life I want to be a hit man. I’m joking. But some people, if they were pets we would put them down, put of their misery. I’m not coming back. I’ll shine the moon instead.


      1. But putting a pet out of its misery is being compassionate, not being a cold-blooded killer or killing someone before they kill you. I’d rather not have to make those choices.


      2. I don’t mean that. I know people that I truly love in so much misery that if they were a pet we would be compassionate. Mental issues as an effect of drugs and abuse has caused brain defects so that they cannot find love or if they do, they destroy it, or test it till they lose it and they are lonely and heart broken and unsaveable, but for God’s mercy, and they don’t die. While they live I love and pray for them, but sometimes, dear God, it’s more than I can cope with to watch their self destruct and fragment and see them writhe in pain and in their own vomit. There are many self mediators taking poison so as not to die of a lack of love.


  1. I can understand your reluctance in asking your mom for help or money. It does have an impact on the relationship. Ax for shortcuts, they usually take us where we don’t want to go. Thanks for sharing your thoughts Yinglan. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You sound like the most amazing daughter. I’m sorry your mom expresses her love so badly. My mother wasn’t great eighter – border line psyco something, but in her weird way they say she loved me. Maybe she did. Anyway, we don’t judge her, we just admire your talents and enjoy your company. You are a good man Charlie Brown.


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