Tag: Creative Writing

Good Morning: A Mini-Flashback

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Today’s daily prompt says, “What’s your earliest memory involving another person? Recreate the scene — from the other person’s perspective.”

To be honest, I don’t remember much about my childhood except for those big moments. I have tons of pictures stuffed in thick photo albums in the basement newly-constructed storage closet but when I look at it, I cannot remember doing any of those thing as a child.

So for this prompt, instead of writing about my earliest memory involving another person, I will just write about a single memory involving another person in the other person’s point of view, which is my mother. This was something I saw when I woke up one morning, so I’ll just imagine the rest and since my mother does not like to think quietly, I practically know her every thought. Well, not every one of them but most of them.

December 22, 2001, about 7:30 am

I sit in front of the desktop. “Loading…” the screen reads. The screen is green and simple. I got this computer 2 years ago and it feels like it’s getting slower and slower.  

I sigh and look over at her, still sleeping. She must be exhausted from the flight. I know I am but I cannot sleep with the time difference. On the other hand, I need to confirm our route. We need to leave for Texas in few hours. As the page loads, I see my husband, Jim, comes into the room, the camera in his hand. “Shh,” I say but he isn’t listening. 

He puts the camera to his eyes and squints. Snap! I feel the camera flashes behind me. Snap! Snap! He takes more pictures of my daughter sprawling all over the bed. It’s how she sleeps ever since she’s little. I glare at my husband, “You’re going to waste the film.” I hiss. 

“But she’s adorable.” I roll my eyes as the screen finally loads. I type in the addresses as quietly as I can while Jim places the camera on the computer desk. 

“Mommy, what’s going on?” She asks, her eyes squinting at the light. 

“Good morning.” I greet. “How did you sleep?” 

“Hmm,” she responds.

“No time difference?” She shakes her head and closes her eyes again.

I didn’t know my step-dad was taking pictures of me sleeping until my mom and I went to develop the rolls of film after we came back to California. I kept those pictures of course. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have come up with this memory. How do I know it was taken then? There’s date and time stamped at the bottom corner of the picture.

Look it Up!

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Today’s Daily Prompt states: “Time to confess: tell us about a time when you used a word whose meaning you didn’t actually know (or were very wrong about, in retrospect).”

Okay, I guess it is time to confess. I watch a lot of television, read quite a few books but when it comes to writing, my vocabulary range is still so so. So when I am writing each post, I usually have to look up some of the words in the dictionary to make sure I am using it correctly.

I can remember, many times, I misunderstood the definition of a word while trying to write just an ordinary post or even a story. The last time I used a wrong word in a post was actually a few days ago and the word was “oblige”. The definition for “oblige” from dictionary.com is:

verb (used with object)
1.to require or constrain, as by law, command, conscience, or force of necessity.
2. to bind morally or legally, as by a promise or contract.
3. to place under a debt of gratitude for some benefit, favor, or service:
4. to put (one) in a debt of gratitude, as by a favor or accommodation:
5. to make (an action, policy, etc.) necessary or obligatory:

I don’t remember what I wanted to do the word for but the meaning was completely opposite of what I was trying to say. I’m glad I looked up the word and checked before I posted it though, or else who knows what will happen, probably you readers will get confused. In the least to say, using the wrong word can lead to confusion and sometimes, it can even be offensive to people. So if there are doubts about the meaning of a word, look it up before using it. 

Back in Time

Published on by Yinglan6 Comments

tEREUy1vSfuSu8LzTop3_IMG_2538Last night, I have finally finish all my work and have a moment to breathe. Actually, it’s a few hours to breathe before I have to jump back to work or worse, prepare for my upcoming test.

To fulfill my fun today, I decide to take a whack at the Daily Prompt, which is interesting, it says, “Congrats! You’re the owner of a new time machine. The catch? It comes in two models, each traveling one way only: the past OR the future. Which do you choose, and why?”

If I have a new time machine, I would choose to go to the past. That being said, I assume I won’t get stuck in time (I can come back to the present) or anything catastrophic (like out of fuel or that the fuel is something ridiculous like Plutonium) that happens in movies like Back to the Future. I am most likely to go back in time to learn about American History.

You’re such a geek! Why do you need to go back in time to learn about history when this is what history books are for?!

The thing is, I think history textbook is kind of bland, it’s all about the important figures. What about the help? There’s never anything about them. So I want to go back in time to learn some of the real stories about the unimportant people instead of reading one of those made-up fiction, although I am not saying they are all made-up but I’d like to confirm.

Oh, and not to mention all those TV shows and movies about the conspiracy theories surrounding the Founding Fathers. I like to know if it’s true. The only thing to find that out, go back in time to the 17th and 18th Century.

After I learn about that, I’d then like to travel to early 20th century. A lot to learn there too. I know this sounds like a waste of time for some of you but I’ve been fascinated with American History ever since I began learning it in 7th grade. There are a lot of things that happened in the past 200 or 300 hundred years and I like to know more and why not get the knowledge the fun and adventurous way. I get to learn about the mechanics of a time machine and get to travel back in time! Woohoo!

By the way, what’s up with the daily post page?

Train Rides

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Sorry for the late post. Well, I guess it’s not that late. It’s not even noon yet but it will be by the time I post this. I’ve been studying and taking an exam all morning. Not the same one as the one on Saturday, it’s a different exam and I feel so much better now that I’m done with my exams for now. Man, I can really use a break but then again, I have class at the moment so I will just be quick.

It’s been a while since I’ve ridden a train. I have ridden plenty of trains especially since I’ve moved to Utah. For the five years during my undergraduate career, I rode the train to school every single day. Then I also rode the transit tracks train to the hospital ever since I’ve got braces. The longest train journey was the 15 hours train ride from Salt Lake City to Sacramento, California.

During that long slow train ride, I can remember cramp hallway and some very creepy travelers. I remember people piling their stuff in the aisles and I have to step over them again and again as I make my way to the observation car. I also remember brushing teeth in a tiny bathroom while getting jostled around as the wheels of the train galloped over the tracks. In a simple word, although it was fun visiting all the quaint little towns along the way, let’s just say it is quite unlikely I will travel by train to California anytime soon.

However, that doesn’t mean I’ve spent a lot of time in a train station. There are no train stations here, there’s only train platform and rarely does something happen there. So the only station I’ve ever been in was the Sacramento Train Station and I don’t even know the name of that. Therefore, the only stories that’s left to tell are those happened on the train. I think I will tell those another day. For today though, I think I will just settle with that short one above about my train ride to California. I may post something else later after lunch and homework.

Exam Day

Published on by Yinglan10 Comments

I am a mess at the moment. In fact, I feel like I am about to blow. With the endless pile of homework and exams, I don’t have a spare moment to relax. Continue reading “Exam Day” →

If I have a vial of truth serum…

Published on by Yinglan8 Comments

Today’s daily prompt states: You’ve come into possession of one vial of truth serum. Who would you give it to (with the person’s consent, of course) — and what questions would you ask?

Hmm, which poor soul would I use the truth serum on?

You know, I am a curious person yet I seldom ask questions. I believe that is because sometimes asking too much questions drive a person crazy and I hate making people feel bad. Hmm, is that why I let my smart-mouth cousin say things about over and over? Is that why I cannot get him to shut up?

Anyway, if I have a vial of truth serum, I probably would keep it and never use it. But let’s say hypothetically that I do use it. I can interrogate anyone I want, three people come to mind but the question is what do I ask them?

Assuming my curiosity have driven me insane and I finally decide to use my secret weapon, truth serum, the two people I would use it on would be my grandparents. By then, I probably won’t even ask for their consent before injecting them both with half of dose of the truth serum. I don’t want to be cruel but I’m afraid if I use the truth serum on them, I am more than desperate. Either way, I will get the answer that’s been bugging me for most of my life.

If I don’t use the truth serum on my grandparents to get some deserving answers, I would otherwise use it for curiosity and the person I would use it on is my first crush. The story is we sort of fell in like with each other in freshman high school but he never told me he likes me. However, right before I moved to Texas, his sister told me that he likes me but if he did like me, wouldn’t he tell me that himself? So it makes me feel suspicious about the truth.

Of course, I would ask him for consent because he isn’t my grandparents and I have a feeling he would consent because he is a little shy and is probably afraid to tell the truth without truth serum. So the questions I would ask him are:

  • Did you have a crush on me in high school, before I moved to Texas?
  • Why did you have your sister tell me instead of telling me yourself?

Unless, someone else is keeping something from me, these are the three individuals I would ever use the truth serum on.

Too Much Too Little

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ednaferber382367Today’s Daily Prompt reads: “Perhaps too much of everything is as bad as too little.” – Edna Ferber Do you agree with this statement on excess?

Yes, actually, I do agree with this statement. Some things are just perfect in the middle. Take baking, for example. If you have a cake with either too much salt or sugar, the cake won’t taste right.

It’s similar to my situation now. Late last night, mom has decided to 100% transfer the car to my aunt who is going to pay it off completely. Today, there’s a guy coming to look at my old car, less than two days after I post an ad to sell it for $2000. If the guy decides to buy my car, I will truly be car-less and you have no idea how horrible it feels because that means I can’t go anywhere. I live in a town where everything is spread out. There’s an enormous need for a car because without a car, I can’t go anywhere.

Anyway, back to the prompt. Mom told me I need to get a car for myself. Even though a used car is just in my price range, it’s out of the question because they won’t let me. It has to be a new car. Here’s where the statement on excess comes in. Mom wants me to buy an All-wheel drive so I’ll be safer on snow and icy roads but those come with a large price tag.

Well, I’m just driving to school and back, 30 miles round trip max daily. Do I really need to get such a pricey car? It’s not like I’m going to go up the mountain or somewhere with high elevation. On the other hand, I did some research on low-price car ($12000- 13000) and well those cars have other worries, wind. I pass through the mouth of a canyon everyday on my way to school and it’s often the windiest spot of the whole drive.

I have driven my mom’s car and it swayed uncontrollably like a piece of paper. That’s what I’m worried about with those cars. I guess I should probably go for the middle price, not the ridiculous price on the new car mom bought yesterday yet not as low as the tiny hatchbacks that might get me scared of the wind. Maybe I should just settle in the $15000 to $19000 price range because too large of a price will cause me a headache and too small of a price will make me run away from driving. 

Some Truthful Answers Please

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Example of handwriting with gold penI am so nervous about today. Since my car can no longer drive, I’ll have to take the bus home while mom, aunt, and cousin go search for new car for me. It’s a 90-minutes bus ride plus a 20-minute walk home but I am thankful for that because that means I won’t be involved in car-shopping. Trust me, it won’t be pretty if I’m involved because I do not like to shop for anything. I always tell my mom, either tell me what to buy or just tell me when it’s ready to pay.

Anyway, today’s prompt asks, You’ve been given the opportunity to send one message to one person you wouldn’t normally have access to. Who’s the person you choose, and what’s the message?

Hmm, that’s a tricky topic. Who will I write to? (drumming fingers on desk)

Does God count as one of those person? Because I have an important question I want to ask him that I know he might be the only one that has the answer for me and the prompt did say to write to one person I won’t normally have access to. God seems to fit the criteria.

My message is:

I’ve always been in the dark about my father’s death. When he died, I was four and everyone just assumed that by keeping me in the dark, it would prevent me from grief. My mom didn’t cry. Her face remained stone hard. 

It was a few weeks later that she told me my dad was gone. I asked how and she just told me heart attack. I believed her then but as I got older, I grew suspicious because I found out it was my grandparents who told my mother about the cause of death. When I was around 7 or 8, I asked my grandparents about it but they gave me a stern talking to about never saying the words “die” or “death” under their roof. So I gave up. 

So I need some truthful answers because all I have is that he collapsed at a restaurant. Also, the only ones who would most likely to have the answers are my grandparents and frankly, I don’t think they are going to tell me anytime soon. So I am asking you, God, to please tell me exactly how my father died because I think after this long, I deserve the truth. 

Thanks for your time

Published on by Yinglan9 Comments

In several occasions during the past few years, I have been placed in a room full of strangers, mostly students I don’t know. Most of the times, they would ask me about my story but none of the times, they would give me the full allotted time to do. I mean, at least give me 2 minutes. I would’ve been grateful for four but come on, they would had lost their attention by then. After all, they are teenagers, they have a shorter attention span during adults.

In those occasions when I am placed in a classroom full of bratty hormonal teenagers who think life is all about shopping for brand-names like my cousin. He won’t wear anything that’s not a famous brand-name like Nike or Calvin Klein. That’s why we had to go to the Outlet Mall on Saturday, to get some brand-name clothing for him. Same with the ones I used to deal with at a time when people barely classified me as an adult.

Anyway, I am usually only given about 30 seconds to a minute to introduce myself before those people realize they don’t need to take me seriously. I can never figure out why until I looked myself in the mirror and realized I wasn’t intimidating enough. Clearly, you need to have an intimidating face to be a teacher and if you don’t, well, let’s just say you will come home screaming everyday crying out “Why!”

Anyway, at the start of the class, I would say something like, “I am Yinglan and you will be learning ESL from me.”

Then someone would raise their hand, “What is ESL?”

“English-as-a-Second-Language.”

“Anyway, I will be teaching you the basis of English starting with grammar and vocabulary.” Then I’d pass out the disclosure statement, all the teachers does it, that states my rules. I’d read each rule aloud, then have them sign it. Just like that, strict town and anxiety was over. They began talking and not listening to me.

They must have sensed something about me that I couldn’t sense myself. They have decided to not take me seriously. That’s why I like blogging by the way, people here don’t know who I am, they don’t know what I sound like. I am just another normal-ish person. If I was given a chance to be in a room full of stranger that would give me 4 minutes of their undivided attention, I would be able to tell from life story and by that, I mean, the slightly extended version of “About me“.

If I meet my extended family…

Published on by Yinglan1 Comment

extended circlesIn the past week, I’ve managed to learn something new about my extended family. It turns out I have a bunch more of family in China, more than I’ve ever known (grandparents, aunts, uncles).

Anyway, for as long as I could remember, I’ve always been the second oldest among my cousins that is until mom told me a couple days ago about an older cousin whom I’ve never known about in China. Now, I maybe third eldest or the forth or the fifth… Whoever knows.

I had to asked, “How much more family do I have?”

She chuckled, “More than you know.”

“Well, then the next time I go back, remind me to have them sit in one room and everyone will introduce themselves.”

If I am to meet all of them, my entire clan, for the first time today and I assume today means the present, some time in the 21st century and not some time in the 1900’s, that is exactly what I am going to do. I am going to sit them all in a giant circle, the eldest shall sit directly across from me while from there on, the circle shall go in a counter-clockwise direction with age like the second eldest would sit to the left of the eldest and it goes on. Then we’ll go around the circle introducing each other.

I am sure that is the strangest way they have ever encountered to introduce themselves, after all, why would they need to? They know each other. Unfortunately I don’t know them, so we’ll do it my way. Wait, would I be known as the family’s weirdo after that? I bet I will but I am sure some of my many cousins will have my back. So I’ll probably have a posse. 🙂

Life’s Tiny Rambles

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Okay, I guess you know by now that I like to talk about me. Well, who doesn’t? Talking about ourselves is the best subject we know. Well, today, I can because the daily prompt is to just write for 10 minutes.

Anyway, yesterday was a weird day. I went to school and while in class, the wire in my braces shifted and popped out, forcing me to have to waste $1.99 to call my orthodontist. Thank god, his receptionist picked up and I was able to fix it yesterday.

I had to hurried home right after class and made a bowl of ramen noodle. Mom wasn’t home and either was my aunt and cousin, mom took them to register for classes at the community learning center and shopping for food. They bought a lot especially my cousin.

So I left for the orthodontist just as they decided to take a nap to adjust to the time difference. When I came back 2 hours later, they are still asleep! Mom urged me to wake them up. Why do I have to do everything around here? So I did.

Last night, they were so awake. I wonder if they slept at all last night. Well today is their entrance exam to see which level of ESL class they should be placed in. I have to take them there in about 30 minutes.

Well, 10 minutes is almost up and I am in danger of one of them busting through my door any second to wake me up. So I guess that’s all I am going to say today. Have a great day! 🙂

Meddling with Other’s Happiness

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I'm sure some of you've seen this picture.
I’m sure some of you’ve seen this picture.

This morning feels kind of weird to me because despite only sleeping for 7 hours, I feel weirdly awake. That’s right, my aunt and cousin have arrived and their first test, adjusting time zone difference.

Anyway, at least today’s daily prompt is so much better than yesterday and the day before. It asks: Are you a good judge of other people’s happiness? Tell us about a time you were spot on despite external hints to the contrary (or, alternatively, about a time you were dead wrong).

No, I am not a good judge of other people’s happiness. That’s why I typically stay out of people’s way because first of all, I am a doubtful person, I have doubts after each decision that was made. Also I don’t try to meddle in other people’s business because if it doesn’t work out, I will definitely be the person to blame and I don’t want that.

The last time I meddle in other people’s happiness was with my mom and it’s just a few months ago. I remember writing about this in a series of posts a few months ago too. I meddled in my mom’s happiness by persuading her to purchase that plot of land. She kept awing on how nice the view was. So I told her just buy it, whatever makes her happy.

But then, she was having second thoughts because the view was partially blocked by the house in front. In the end, she refused the offer because she lost the $4000 custom design bonus as well as the partially obstructed view.

Also last week, she started feeling thankful she didn’t purchase the land because yesterday she got fired. Yeah, I know, horrible, at least that’s what a normal person would react but she was happy. Apparently, she wanted to leave for a long time but didn’t want to resign because then she wouldn’t get unemployment benefits. So she’s just waiting for the right moment.

Anyway, after that land fiasco that I went through this past summer, I am never ever convincing mom to do anything ever again because it will probably and always end up my fault.

Eye of the Beholder

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You know, I have to agree with Martha here. These do you agree/disagree prompts are kind of uninspiring. They don’t really inspire me to write anything. This morning after my aunt called me at 5:52 am to tell me she got onto the flight at Seoul and asks me to check whether it will arrive at LAX on time this afternoon. Anyway, after I checked, I took a look at the Daily Prompt, a minute after it went live at 6 am sharp.

I was like what? Again with the agree/disagree questions? What are they trying to do, make me write a one-sentence answer? So I went back to bed and let the prompt brew in my head like a steaming cup of coffee. So now, 2.5 hours later, I’m awake and here we go.

Today’s daily prompt asks: We’ve all heard that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Do you agree? is all beauty contingent on a subjective point of view?

I am neutral on this one. This means, I agree and disagree. It all depends. Everyone’s beauty is different. Some are on the outside and some are on the inside. Like the prompt says, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. If everyone sees beauty the same way, everyone would be in love with each other. 

However, some beauty are contingent on a subjective point of view. Ah, I can’t think of an example here but some are. And that’s all I can say about this topic. Please come up with some creative prompts. I don’t really like to analyze things and I can’t write any sort of story with these prompts or is it just me. 

Anyway, I ran into a little snag just 5 minutes ago. Mom forgot to give me back my parking permit. I have to leave early to get cash to park in the pay lot today. That means I am going to have to miss my Beta Alpha Psi meeting today. Darn my forgetful brain. Please let there be parking in that pay lot.

A Life-changing Accident

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Sometimes, when life’s going too great, there ought to be a curve ball or two coming your way. Continue reading “A Life-changing Accident” →

5 things I wish to change about me

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No such thing as perfectThere are always a million things we want to change about our lives. So to list five is a difficult choice. But will crossing out those five things make our lives easier? Slightly more enjoyable? It depends, everyone is different. The five things I want to change in my life are:

1. I wish I was fast at doing things. I used to be called a slow-poke but to be honest, I’ve seen some people who are even slower than me which it’s annoying and those people are all guys.

Like the international student who came to stay with us for a month or so, we didn’t have a bathroom in the basement then, so I had to share my bathroom with him. It takes him forever to shower and it takes him even longer to get ready. It annoyed the crap out of mom and it’s even worse with me. It’s like he does things in slow-motion. This is one of the things I want to change. I try to do thing fast but sometimes in a rush, my workmanship become sloppy.

2. I wish I was more social. I am trying to accomplish this exact thing at the moment but I always back down the last minute thinking I will have another opportunity to take to this person. Guess what, I don’t.

I want to be able approach one of the Beta Alpha Psi member or even the person who sits next to me in class and be able to strike a conversation. I like being a loner but sometimes being a loner is not the good way to live life.

3. I wish I had perfect skin and not what I have now, blackhead filled and acne everywhere. I am tired of having to use different stuff and scrub the crap out of my skin every night. Also, if I have perfect skin, I won’t have to photoshop every one of my photos. 🙂

4. I wish I wasn’t born with this ridiculously rare genetic disorder that barely any doctor knows about. I want to grow, have bigger hands and feet, and I want to be taller and thin. Most of all, I want to be what it’s considered to be a normal person. I don’t want people look at me funny and I don’t want salesmen to knock on my door and ask if my parents are home because they think I am still in my teens.

5. Lastly, I wish I wasn’t raised in a setting where money is all that matters. It made me stingy and cheap. You can say it made me a hoarder, have money but never want to spend it. I don’t want to be that. I want to get what I want and be satisfied instead of racking up money and never getting the things I want.

If I cross these five things from my list of changes I want in my life, would it make my life perfect? I am not sure. It might make my life a little more enjoyable but to make life perfect would take a lot more than making changes. After all, there’s no such thing as perfect.

Everything has Feelings!

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To me, everything has feelings and a mind of their own. I know what’s like to be used. To notice you when you’re needed and neglected when you’re not. All my life, I am taught to be careful with objects, that I have to treat it gently to prolong use. So since then, I have treated every object as if it’s a person. Sometimes, I even feel sad for those objects.

Like the couch, I feel sad for it especially when guests come. I remember when my mom’s friend from San Francisco came visit, her son would occupy the leather recliner couch in the family room. I watched as he reclined the seat all the way and then lay his head on the reclining side. The reclining side is the vulnerable part of the recliner couch. The metal won’t hold a lot of weight. That’s the part that’s supposed to hold the feet, not the upper part of the body.

I felt awful for the couch, for having to endure all of that but I was afraid to tell the boy to not lay like that but his mom was there and I was equally afraid of his mom as mine.

Computers, on the other hand, have a much more sophisticate mind of my own. Though it doesn’t have feelings, it has a mind of its own. So I guess the most human machine I own would be my two laptops and the external hard-drive.

A voice in my head

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(Yawn) I am so tired today. At least I get to skip my second class at mom’s request. 🙂 She doesn’t want to wait at the airport. So I am rushing over right after my first class to pick her up. Yay me! Anyway, today’s daily prompt is a good one. It read:

Your blog is about to be recorded into an audiobook. If you could choose anyone — from your grandma to Samuel L. Jackson — to narrate your posts, who would it be?

Every post I’ve written, when I was writing, I listened to this narrative voice in my head. It’s almost like it’s talking to me, telling me what to write. It doesn’t sound like me either. I mean, it is me but a much more mature and normal voice than my own. Trust me, if you ever hear my voice on the phone or whatever, you would think it’s a child speaking.

If my blog is ever going to be recorded into an audiobook, I would choose one of those people who does the narratives for the documentaries about deceased authors. What? You ask. I know, you’re confused but that is somewhat what the voice in my head sounds like, the people that does the narratives on those shows. Like a few weeks ago, I watched American Masters on PBS, it was doing a documentary on that author that wrote “Gone with the Wind”, oh, I can’t bring up her name at the moment.

Anyway, there’s a female narrator that I assume sounded like the author, read snips of the book. It sounded like an emotional robot sometimes but at the same time, it had this sad sound to it that makes it feel like it’s reading the book like a diary. That is kind of what my blog is, a diary. So if my posts is ever going to be recorded, that’s the kind of voice I want.

Oh gosh, late for school, later! 🙂

Meaningful Hand-me-downs

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I am no stranger to hand-me-downs but then again who is, unless you’re incredibly rich but even then, you will have something that is sort of a hand-me-down. Mom and I almost escaped to Salt Lake City from Austin with just the things that can fit into her small car (long story, will/might tell later). So we didn’t have a lot when we came here but not to the point that we had to start over.

We moved into an one-bedroom apartment a few weeks after we arrived. We had no furniture. For the first few days, we sat on a towel on the carpet while eating from some spare bowls lend to us by mom’s nosy friend who lived several blocks away.

That first weekend, when her nosy friend’s husband was off, he helped move  all the furniture that’s been occupying his garage into our apartment. They were eager to get rid of it even though some of it were still pretty much brand new. It belonged to Mrs. Nosy’s uncle who decided to leave Utah and move back to San Francisco.

The apartment was soon furnished with second-hand furniture. An out-of-date flowery pattern love seat in the living room while a really weird texture Laz-Boy sofa-bed in the bedroom where mom and I will sleep for the next two years. Then a folded table and very heavy chairs for dining, a rectangular broken-legged mirror-glass coffee table as well as a square table for the hand-me-down TV and some shelves. Even the silverware were hand-me-downs.

The Laz-boy sofa bed and the square coffee table that used to hold the TV. See what I mean about the mirror-glass?
The Laz-boy sofa bed and the square coffee table that used to hold the TV. See what I mean about the mirror-glass?
The love-seat. Don't be fool by the length, there are only two cushions.
The love-seat. Don’t be fool by the length, there are only two cushions.

But I was thankful because we were struggling back then. Mom’s new job as a school teacher hadn’t begin so we didn’t have any income and I was only 16. Anyway, 100% of the things in that apartment were hand-me-downs.

A block away from the apartment was a thrift shop and that was where we would shop until we moved to our current home 30 miles away. Mrs. Nosy loved this thrift shop because a lot of wealthy old people lived nearby and their homes are full of beautiful antiquities. As well as that, a lot of the clothes that were donated were pretty clean and new. I didn’t like shopping in that store at first because I thought second-hand clothes were yucky. But I adjusted after a while and knew where to look.

We got quite a deal in that store, most of the clothes we bought were $1 and some of them were free. Anyway, when we moved into our current home, again, we were nearly furniture-less because when you move from a 500 square-foot apartment to a 2000 square-house, it will make a difference. We had no beds. So for the first week or so, we slept on the sofa bed which now resides in the family room. Then the love seat now resides in the living room. We rarely shop at the thrift shop now because we often find better deals at the Exchange in the air force base.

Out of all the hand-me-downs I had in my life and I have had a lot, there three items I think it’s the most meaningful.

  1. The television-set that was giving to us by my step-grandparents when we moved to Austin. We were just about broke back then with my step-dad spending every dime my mom made from her two jobs on alcohol and cigarettes. This television-set provided entertainment and comfort for me because at least for a short time, I can forget I live in tiny apartment with constant fighting parents.
  2. The sofa-bed that was handed down by Mrs. Nosy’s uncle. It provided me with a place to sleep. Not comfortable but it’s better than sleeping on the ground.
  3. The television also handed-down by Mrs. Nosy’s uncle. It provided mom and me hours of entertainment while we spent many late-nights during that first year staying up grading paper.

I know my definition of “meaningful” is different than everyone else’s but these three things got me through some tough times. Isn’t that’s what the term “meaningful” is about? Getting through memorable hard times? Anyway, when I listen to this song, it kind of remind me of those times.

Just writing this post makes me feel older already. Today is my lunar birthday. I may be turning 23 in a few weeks but I bet my aunt will send me a card today saying happy 24th because some people in China go by the lunar birthdays and count the 9 months in the mother’s belly.

If I can only dream…

Published on by Yinglan5 Comments

About two years ago, while I was heading to the computer lab to print off some papers, a boy I don’t remember meeting came up to me and said, “How are you?”

I was like, “There are good.” Do I know you? I wanted to ask but if he knew me, I should have known him too. Perhaps we were in a class together. Besides, I was afraid of looking stupid for not remembering someone but now after graduating, I realized that wasn’t stupid at all. I’ve been in numerous classes, there are ought to be a few forgotten faces along the way.

Anyway, he nodded, “Well it’s nice to see you again.” Then he walked away.

I continued walking toward the computer lab, reminiscing my strange encounter. Who is that? Then I started ticking off the classes I’ve been in so far and kept coming back to the Computer Science class I took about a year earlier. Maybe that’s it. Maybe that’s the class we shared.

If I twisted this situation and changed the location to say, oh I don’t know, a cafe, and instead of saying how are you, he says, “I’ve been looking for you.” I would had been completely freaked because there are two reasons and only two reasons why he would say those words:

  1. He has been looking for his soul mate or someone that has a mysterious supernatural connection to him and it just so happens to be me. That is if such thing exist.
  2. I forgot I have a team assignment and I didn’t do my part. This guy just come and drag me to work on the assignment.

I would have asked, “Do I know you?” under reason #1 or “Oh my gosh, did I forget the group assignment?” under reason #2. Then I would probably get either an exasperating answer or a don’t worry about it, we’re already finished. That would be my lucky day and I lean back to enjoy my drink.

Under reason #1 however, I would imagine him smiling and sits down. Then we’d start a conversation about whatever and fall in love almost instantaneously. Then we get married and live happily ever after. Did I mention I am a dreamer? Yeah, well if I can only dream of such situation happening in real life…

Locked and Sealed or So I thought

Published on by Yinglan1 Comment

Once in a while, we all spill a few secrets, unintentionally of course, but we can’t help it. Conversations just starts and sometimes it just comes naturally. Some might think that this is just an act of nosiness. I don’t agree. In fact, I think this is an act of nosiness.

I remember earlier this year, at Chinese New Year, when mom’s friend invited me out to dinner, I ranted to her in confidence about my fight with grandparents two nights before. At least or so I thought.

Exactly a week later, when mom came back from her temporary duty in D.C. and asked her friend out to morning tea, that friend, the one I ranted to, retold the entire thing to mom. I just sat there, my face reddened and jaw dropped a little while my heart felt like it was going to pop out any minute. I was afraid to see mom’s reaction.

Fortunately, she decided to not embarrass me right there in the restaurant. She didn’t say anything. Mostly, it’s because she knew the whole thing already. I told her right after that phone call. Still though, I ranted to her friend in confidence and her friend had just spilled it out. It was like it was in the conversation either. We just walked in, sat down, and that’s the first thing she said.

After tea, mom and I got into the car. That was when she gave me the look of disapproval. “Why did you have to tell her that?” She asked me.

Yeah, why did I tell her friend the fight between me and my grandparents? Well first thing’s first, I did not expect her to blab to mom about it. I expected her to just keep it to herself. Also, mom wasn’t around, so I had to complain to someone about my failed relationship with my grandparents.

“I didn’t really tell her.” I lied.

“Really, then how did she know so much?” I shrugged. “Well, in the future, don’t tell her anything. You know she’s nosy. That’s why I don’t tell her anything about my work.”

That’s how that risky conversation ended and from then on, I just kept my mouth shut whenever I’m around that friend.

Lessons learned:

  1. Never complain to nosy friend. They’ll just re-tell it to someone else whenever they get a chance.
  2. Lying sometimes can help avoid an argument.

Have a great day! 🙂

Sticking to the Present

Published on by Yinglan1 Comment

I woke up this morning, feeling confident and energized. I turned on my computer and took a look at the daily prompt.

You’ve been granted the power to predict the future! The catch — each time you use your power, it costs you one day (as in, you’ll live one day less). How would you use this power, it at all?

I often dreamed of having such powers as predicting the future but what good would this power do if it cost me a day? Also, wouldn’t it be the same as letting everything play out instead of trying to change it before it occurs?

I have learned from many movies, TV shows, and books that trying to change the future would cause devastation and tragic effects. Gee, even the story I’m writing tells exactly just that. Don’t meddle with future.

So even though it would be nice to find out what the future will be like, you know, whether I will get a job, get married, and have kids, etc, I think I’ll stick to the present and let fate plays out.

This is just a quick post to start my morning. I have a club meeting to go to and then who know what. Catch ya later. 🙂

Sharing the Saddness

Published on by Yinglan5 Comments

82336-oI can choose to listen to happy songs but I cannot choose a happy movie, or show, or book. Every movie, show, and book have its tear-jerking moment. It’s simply unavoidable. Those moments make me cry like a puppy.

Mom and aunts used to say I’m low on my emotions quotient (EQ) because I did not react to things as well as they expect me to. Well, how did you expect me to react when I am constantly being threatened with a feather duster? The first time, sure I react with a little tears because I was a child but enough time, I grow as hard as a shell.

When I told mom I cried like a baby when I was reading the book If I Stay, she scoffed and said, “What’s there to cry about? People live and they die.” Then she went into this big lecture about god-knows-what. I stopped listening. The same thing happened when I told what a good book it was when I read Everything we ever wanted.

To be honest, I rarely seen mom cry. I only seen her fake cry when she stubs her toe. It’s sort of like a laugh cry, no tears and her lower lip sticks out like a sad puppy. Her exterior shell must be tougher than a turtle and to mask her sadness, she chooses anger and frustration. Now, that’s sad.

I think crying is natural, it expresses our feelings and sometimes, you just can’t help feeling the sadness as one of the characters in the book, movie, or show. I remember when I read The Faults in our Stars, when one of the characters (I won’t spoil anything) died and the main character was completely sadden by the loss of her love, I could instantly feel tears creeping into my eyes and flowing steadily down my cheeks. I had to wipe it before mom came in and gave me another one of her lectures about how crying about a book is silly.

Look who’s got low emotions quotient now. Seriously, I think there’s something wrong with mom’s emotion, she is incapable of showing sadness. I didn’t even see her cry when one of our family members died in the past five years. She just sighed and said, “Well, that’s life. What can you do?” At least show a little tear and respect.

My Own Show

Published on by Yinglan2 Comments

I hate picking favorites of anything. I guess because I don’t like hurting people’s feelings. But secretly, I enjoy it. I just don’t like pick in front of people. But sometimes, I don’t really have favorites. Like shows and movies, if you’d ask me to pick a favorite, well that’s one question I cannot answer. Gee, I can’t remember what I watched.

Today’s prompt asks,

You’ve just been named the casting director of your favorite television show (or movie franchise). The catch: you must replace the entire cast — with your friends and family. Who gets which role?

I will tell you one thing, my family is out. I don’t care how much they want stardom, they would not in a lifetime be in anything where I am the casting director. Neither would my dad’s family because if I bring either family into a room, there would be arguing with somebody. With both sides of my family in the same, a war of two tribes would instantly brew.

Hey that could be a show. No no no, not when I am running the show!

If I can make up my own little show, the genre would be dramedy and it would feature my former best friend, Cindy, playing somewhat of the popular girl slash frienemy  to a foolish naive girl and then when that girl recovers and gains popularity, she’d dump her and instantly becomes her rival.

Okay, maybe if it’s a dramedy, it might feature my mom playing the annoying nagging ill-temper mother to that naive lonesome girl but that’s it. NO more family. Then the show or movie or whatever would be titled The Life or Diary of… of that naive girl’s name.

Well that’s it of my rambling. Have a great day and later. 🙂